A Meme

Mama Podkayne over at My Total Perspective Vortex tagged me and now I need to complete a meme where I tell you 6 things that I have never written about myself before. That’s tough!

1. When I was younger I seemed to be a magnet for any perv in the area. At age 9, I was waiting for a friend of mine in a park near our house when I saw a man nearby who had whipped out his you-know-what and was doing you-know-what to it. The same man did the same thing in the same park about 3 years later but this time I had a much better idea about what was going on and I ran home. My father couldn’t understand why I was so upset. “Did you think it was a snake come to bite you?” Nice. At age 19, a friend of mine and I were in a mall parking lot and a car pulls up next to us. The driver calls us over and guess what? He had no pants on and was doing you-know-what to himself. Sheesh! Three years later I’m walking through a different mall with my mother and sister when this really skeezy dude bends down next to my ear and says, “Nice tits honey”, in the slimiest way possible. It unnerved me so I stopped a security guard and immediately he was surrounded and caused a big scene, saying I was lying, etc. Ends up he had a knife in his pocket and a hole cut out of the crotch of his pants. He had been banned from the mall already for exposing himself to customers. See? I told you I was a magnet.

2. I believe I scared myself into a c-section with my firstborn. Childbirth terrified me more than anything ever had before and I truly believe I willed myself into surgery. The mind is a powerful thing.

3. For many years, I planned to have a career in cosmetics and wanted to develop my own cosmetics line. It was going to be called,”Maquillage”, which means “makeup” in French. I was discouraged in high school because my dad told me that I’d never be successful at my own line due to my poor grades in chemistry.

4. I just KNEW I was going to have two sets of twins. One set of girls and one set of boys. I don’t remember the boys’ names but the girls were going to be Mandy and Randy, short for Amanda and Miranda. LOL Ugh, reading romance novels as a teenage is hazardous to your imagination.

5. Man, this is really hard! Let’s see. Since I turned 16 I have had 11 cars. Considering I’ve only been driving for 20 years that seems like a lot of cars to me. I used to suffer from car fever pretty badly.

6. Supposedly, in our family tree, we are related to Pocahontas on my mom’s side and Sir Edmund Spenser on my dad’s side. In case you don’t know, Edmund Spenser wrote “The Faerie Queen”. I felt my relation to Pocahontas should have guaranteed me more exotic looks and my relation to Spenser should have guaranteed me writing talent and some extra credit in my English classes. LOL I think we can all see how that all turned out…

Anyway, I’m not tagging anyone in particular but if you’d like to join in, please leave a comment here along with a link so we can read more about you!!